R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Aretha Franklin sang about it. Aristotle, Shakespeare, and Baudelaire wrote about it. Thomas Jefferson referenced it in the Declaration of Independence. Machiavelli mentioned it in “The Prince.” A 14-year-old George Washington made it the first entry in his “Rules of Civility & Decent Behaviour,” based on an earlier book of French maxims: “every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those that are present.” If a teenaged future president grasped the importance of respect in life and society, why does it seem so difficult for so many today, both in and out of public life?

Closely allied with respect is dignity. In his radio address to the opening session of the United Nations conference in San Francisco in April of 1945, President Harry S. Truman said that “We must build a new world, a far better world – one in which the eternal dignity of man is respected.” He had been president for only ten days; the nation was mourning the passing of Franklin Roosevelt, World War II still was underway though winding down, and his message to the nation and to the world was both inspirational and aspirational.

Truman was known for his plain-speaking and frequent use of four-letter words, although rarely in public. When ladies of a garden club objected to his use of the word “manure” versus “fertilizer,” Mrs. Truman noted that it had taken 25 years to get her husband to say “manure” in place of something rougher. Today, officeholders and candidates routinely use four-letter words to describe opponents, cities, nations, and races, far from respecting the “eternal dignity of man.” An edit of Truman’s comment today might say “dignity of each person” or “human being,” but the original quote reflects usage common many decades ago.

Respecting others first requires respect for yourself. In her 1937 autobiographical memoir, “This Is My Story,” Eleanor Roosevelt noted that “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” It is not clear if the comment was aimed at the vitriol of radio broadcaster Father Coughlin, whose strident and antisemitic harangues captivated millions of listeners prior to World War II. That was before the Internet and social media, which have few or no guardrails, and permit all manner of identified or anonymous persons to hurl comments, victimizing respect and dignity with nary a second thought.

Most of George Washington’s teenage rules focus on how to dress, eat, stand or sit, reflecting the self-control expected in colonial life in the 1700s. Today, it’s not old-fashioned to demand that our public figures respect the Constitution, federal, state, and local laws, constituents, and colleagues, regardless of political identity. It’s also not old-fashioned, or prudish, to expect those same public figures to respect how they use language. When a national figure, even a former president, routinely uses four-letter words to describe people, places, and notions du jour, our national conversations are coarsened and, sadly, such language tends to become normalized among the population at large, especially young people. How sad to think that they are growing up with such role models.

Respect, dignity, empathy, self-awareness, care for and about others. These are the qualities that young George Washington understood and fostered, for himself and others. As our national conversations rocket toward the November elections, we would be wise to heed the counsel of Mr. Washington, President Truman, and Mrs. Roosevelt, before it’s too late.