The Lady Doth Protest Too Much, Methinks

On Sunday, September 10, Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) was kicked out of a (what was supposed to be family-friendly) matinee of the musical “Beetlejuice,” after a pregnant woman in attendance complained that she was vaping.

But, though Boebert’s vaping has been widely covered as the primary story, it’s just the tip of the iceberg. 

At least three complaints were made by patrons about Boebert and her date vaping, taking pictures, and being disruptive.

Video footage also shows Boebert and her date groping one another, taking phone pictures (with flash, no less), and acting like… well, drunken fools.

At first her campaign manager, Drew Sexton, denied that she was vaping, then texted that  Boebert “pleads guilty to singing along, laughing and enjoying herself.”

To be clear, she is on camera aggressively blowing large vape clouds directly into the backs of heads in the row in front of her. The pregnant woman allegedly asked her to stop, to no avail.

Boebert and her date were then asked to stop by ushers and warned by security that they would be asked to leave if it continued.  The two argued with security and dismissed their concerns.  

Just five minutes into the second act, another complaint was received that they were not only still disruptive, but were recording.  Denver Police were contacted after the couple refused to leave.

Boebert claimed to be “on the board,” asked “do you know who I am?” and promised to call the Mayor in retaliation.

But is this LGBTQ+ News?

Boebert is one of just a handful of influential accounts on social media that created the “grooming” conspiracy theory about queer people.  She regularly claims that Drag Queens are “grooming” children, and that LGBTQ+ inclusive legislation and workplace initiatives are somehow  “sexualizing” children.  

Boebert has called for boycotts of companies for using drag queens in advertising.  She has built her entire political personality off of homophobia and transphobia (well, and carrying guns into gun-free zones).

To top it all off, the man seen with his hand entirely in her cleavage during the show — Quinn Gallagher — is part owner of Hooch Craft Cocktail Bar in Aspen, which hosts LGBTQ+ events, including “A Winter Wonderland Burlesque & Drag Show.”

This may be delicious to some Democrats — it is certainly salacious — and for LGBTQ+ folks it may be validating to see the hypocrisy laid bare.  In reality, though, this isn’t fun for us at all.  It’s beyond frustrating.  It’s traumatizing. 

Because she’s still on TV. She’s still in Congress. And her party is bending over backwards to defend her, deny what is on video, and shamelessly doubling-down on their claims that, somehow, it’s the Gays and Trans folks and Drag Queens that are really a threat to decency or society’s moral fabric.

At some point one has to wonder what else they’re trying to throw folks off the scent of with their manufactured moral panic.

But What Did Boebert Learn?

“I’ve learned to check party affiliations before going on a date,” she recently said after mostly dismissing her behavior and agreeing with speculation during video interviews that it was, perhaps, all a setup.

Lauren Boebert won her election by just 550 votes in 2022. She’s up for election next November. 

This is Your Reminder

This is your reminder that early voting begins on Friday (yes, this Friday).

A Change of Tone, If You’ll Allow It

Last week I said to be continued. I’ll keep exploring the hypocrisy as I try to put into words the feelings this evokes in me and, I imagine, many other queer people. 

This week, though, I’m going to end this week’s column on a happy note. My little sister got married to her amazing wife on Saturday, and I wrote a poem for their wedding that I’d like to share with you.

My Little Big Sister Kat

When I was told a sister would be added to our tribe, my young imagination started quickly to describe, / a pink dress wearing Barbie fan (more glitter in the home!). Excitement grew to perhaps spend less pony time alone. / Effeminate and bullied, so afraid of everything, my idea of a sister was a far too simple thing. / I look back now amused at my naïve specifications, considering how I myself rejected expectations. / And from the moment you came home you made it very clear, that no outside perspective would convince you to adhere.

Throughout the years I’ve watched in awe at your strong constitution, and wondered how I could at all provide a contribution. / I tripped into the world embarrassed at every stumble, but you have such conviction in your life it makes me humble. / And even though at six a big brother I thought I’d be, I watch the way you live your life and you inspire me. 

 But still the most incredible inspiring thing I’ve seen was how you somehow bloomed more when Gina entered the scene. / And suddenly it seems that every step along the way was guiding your lives perfectly to unite on this day. / And though many may not agree, I do not always share the feelings deep inside my head, though I do deeply care. 

Though not a big surprise to me — I always knew you would — with Gina now I know you’ll build a life unique and good. / And now I have another sister, funny, cute, and sweet… and my little big sister Kat has made her life complete. / So as I look at all the friends collected on the way, I raise my glass to toast the love we celebrate today. 

Kat and Gina, I couldn’t be more proud to have you both as sisters, and no matter how well I (maybe, sometimes) write, I could never do justice to how thrilled I am you found each other.  I love you both.