Our Man In Arlington

The Fourth of July has always been a special event in the Barton household. We have done it all. Outdoor barbecues, proud display of the American flag, red, white and blue bunting, community parades featuring patriotically dressed kids on bikes or in wagons are but a few of the features of our long history of Fourth of July celebrations.

In 1976, the Arlington community in which we then lived formally invited Queen Elizabeth to our festivities, which we held on a closed one-block street. The Queen was going to be in the country, so why not invite her to join with us on that quintessential American holiday? She could not come, alas, but a very kind letter from one of her ladies-in-waiting was proudly posted on a tree along the parade route, along with a portrait of the Queen.

This year, we decided to turn our Fourth of July into a gala political event. Last September, we auctioned off a traditional Fourth of July picnic and a good view of the Washington Monument fireworks from our 16th floor balcony at the annual Arlington Democratic Party fall fundraising dinner.

Last Sunday, therefore, twenty enthusiastic Democrats arrived at our door early in the evening. We had all the trimmings: fried chicken, coleslaw, Boston baked beans, biscuits with honey, and a shrimp appetizer, topped off with apple pie and vanilla ice cream. How American can you get?

When nine o’clock rolled around, we opened our wide balcony doors to watch the spectacular fireworks display, with our huge television set showing close up views of the fireworks and blaring out the 1812 Overture being played at the concert on the west lawn of the Capitol. The grand finale brought out loud cheers from the balconies all around us. It was grand fun.

In place of the letter from the Queen’s Lady-in-Waiting, we prominently posted a great picture of George and Laura Bush that had been recently received by my wife, Jean. The inscription read: “Ms. Barton, thank you for your early commitment and dedication as a Charter Member of the campaign in Virginia. Grassroots leaders like you are the key to building a winning team.” George and Laura personally signed the picture. The letter accompanying the picture began “Dear Jean.”

The sentiment was certainly nice, and Jean appreciated receiving it. One problem, however. Jean is not a Charter Member of the Republican campaign in Virginia and never intends to be.

It was an honor, nonetheless.

Imagine our surprise, then, when several of our guests told us they had received the same picture with the same personally inscribed message. And these were among the most active Democrats in the county and the state! Was the President trying to tell us something?

Much of the conversation swirled around the mystery. What mailing lists were being used? How had their names gotten on the mailing lists? How could they get off the mailing lists? These were not insignificant questions, since most of them had some degree of expertise in the care and feeding of mailing lists.

In the end, there were no satisfactory answers to these questions. There seemed to be an indication that the Republican’s much vaunted expertise at direct mail campaigning may not be that good after all. This gave us all much hope for a successful fall campaign.

The discussion provided a pleasant leitmotif to a wonderful Fourth of July evening. I wonder what will happen next year to provide some comic relief?